why do you work so hard

Why Do You Work So Hard?

I know you’re working hard.

You’re up early, perhaps before dawn breaks.

You give the day and everyone in it every ounce you’ve got.

Most likely, you’re the last person in your home to go to bed and often the first one to rise.

Feeling exhausted feels normal; it’s your set point.

All you’ve ever known is working hard, stretching yourself thin, and pushing yourself.

Like a friend who sent me a message at 4:19 a.m. this morning while she was catching up on work.

Why Do You Work So Hard?

And, what are you really working hard at? 

Often, we say that we work so hard to earn a living to support our family or ourselves.

We want to do a good job, be noticed, appreciated, even promoted.

Perhaps we’re raised to work so hard and follow a strong work ethic.

We might enjoy what we do or have big goals and dreams.

Sure, we might work hard for any of the reasons above; yet, the real reasons why we work so hard are often tied to deeper limiting beliefs.

So, why do we really work so hard?

The Real Reason You Work So Hard

Most often, we push and drive ourselves so hard because we don’t believe that we’re worthy of approval, belonging, and love just as we are.

If we work super hard, we can prove that we know what we’re doing and that we’re capable, competent, enough, and worthy of approval, belonging, and love.

If we can just prove our worth, then maybe we’ll be recognized, fit in, and loved.

However, deeply embedded limiting beliefs can negatively influence our life and relationships personally and professionally.

They can also feed our anxiety and cause other mental, emotional, and physical issues, such as overeating, overdrinking, and overindulging in behaviors that cause us to lose sleep, gain weight, wreck our nervous system, and compromise our health.

Identifying our most hindering limiting beliefs and how they influence our feelings, actions, and results can offer new options and inspire us in ways we never thought possible, inside and out.

Changing Hard Working Beliefs

Discovering beliefs that drive us to work so hard is one thing, changing them is another.

When we seek to discover and then change limiting beliefs, asking ourselves powerful questions can be extremely beneficial.

Whereas noticing and labeling our emotions is also a useful practice, questioning our beliefs is what ultimately informs our emotional response and chosen actions.

Hard Powerful Questions

Grab a journal and explore the following powerful questions when negative thoughts or limiting beliefs show up around working, producing, or proving yourself:

Why am I working so hard? What am I demanding of myself and why? 

What’s the real reason that I am pushing myself to this extreme? 

Why am I so worried about how people view me and how I view myself? 

Why am I giving others so much power? 

What’s the worst that could happen if I said or decided to stop working so hard?

What do I fear losing if I choose not to work so hard? 

Who would I be, what would I have, and what would I be doing if I chose to take better care of myself and my body, and not work so hard? 

Whereas identifying and changing limiting beliefs takes time and dedicated work, it’s the best work we’ll ever do.

Believe me. I’m proof and so are my clients and students.

So, why do you work so hard? Really?

What’s the deeper belief driving your choice to work so hard? 

The real reason might surprise you.

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